Waking up this morning, my mind started to wander. This isn’t something I like happening because it always ends up at the same place, the same thought, the same fucking conclusion.
"Oh, but what is the conclusion?"
Too dismal for you? Yes of course it is, I’m being an annoying teenager if nothing else. Never mind that though I’ve deemed myself worthy of being an annoying teenager. Seems arbitrary doesn’t it? Well, it is and for more than one reason. Why should I be bitching at all through my shiny new laptop? Why did I wake up from my unbroken sleep to the thought of needing to bitch and moan about my life? Well who else am I to share my thoughts with? Girlfriend-No, can’t speak with something that doesn’t exist. Friends-Pointless. Family-Working or never at home. I can give you dozens of reasons but none of them are really good enough.
I’m being far to grim to be honest. It isn’t that bad. So far I’ve had a really enjoyable summer* despite one unspeakable incident.
Let me ask you a question. Have you ever felt as though you we at the edge of a cliff? Or mayhap the end of a plateau? Not to jump or to do anything unnecessary like that. Just to wait until the edge erodes and crumbles underfoot until you end up at the bottom, where you have to move forward because there’s nowhere else to go. You’re too complacent to search for something more interesting, you’ll just see how it turns out. Too cowardly to take the leap of faith and jump. Not even willing to lean out and see what awaits you at the bottom…
I think I’ll leave it at that, I’ve rambled too long anymore, would just be nonsensical drivel. I my elaborate to some degree later but right now I can’t.
*summer being anytime since last September.
Feel free to leave me any thoughts/general abuse.